Lake Luzerne Man Caught Trying to Steal Chainsaw by Stuffing It in His Pants

Lake Luzerne Man Busted Trying to Steal Chainsaw… in His Pants

LAKE LUZERNE, NY — A local man’s attempt at an unusual heist ended in failure after he was caught trying to walk out of a hardware store with a chainsaw stuffed down his pants.

According to store employees, 41-year-old Brian Wheeler casually entered the shop and made his way to the power tools aisle. After glancing around to make sure no one was watching, he grabbed a chainsaw, turned it blade-first, and somehow wedged it into his oversized jeans.

At first, no one noticed the theft, but as Wheeler waddled stiffly toward the exit, employees became suspicious.

“He was trying to play it cool, but the guy looked like he was walking with a pair of stilts,” said store assistant manager Tom Ridley. “That’s when we knew something was off.”

When confronted, Wheeler tried to make a run for it, but his awkward gait turned his escape into a slow-motion shuffle. He barely made it past the front doors before stumbling and landing flat on the pavement.

Sheriff’s deputies arrived shortly after and took Wheeler into custody. He now faces charges of attempted grand larceny—along with some serious questions about his judgment.